Archive for the apprentice
Irish Apprentice Watch – Week 7 – Ding dong the witch is dead…
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Review by Ian Walsh
‘Oh my God’ shrieked Joanna when she learned that her ‘cream of the crop’ Team Dynamo had lost. This may have been one shock but the best was yet to come. Joanna’s usual frozen smile was soon turned to shock when Bill asked ‘Who is Ray Murphy?’ a hesitant Joanna looked as if she was going to deny knowing her own husband, as we later learned. We all know that Joanna is not one to ‘hide in the long grass’ or ‘wait in the bushes’ so it was always going to be an explosive exit.
Basically Joanna sent an email to her husband on Friday evening to ‘rally the troops’, aka her friends and family to raid a close by recycle centre and bring the goods to her recycle centre in Naas, unknown to her fellow team mates. I would suggest watching the show back again because I have done so and it appears a little more apparant to me. Of course this full scale fiddle proved to be Joanna’s downfall as all her hard work of cheating came crumbling down around her. She was asked ‘to think outside the box’ but Joanna ‘brought the box’ in her words. The one she was to be carted out of the show in, dominant till the end. That’s Joanna alright!
If she thought Bill had fired the girl with the ‘liaroidi’ she had another thing coming especially when her talk of making Bill choose who was to come back into the boardroom turned out to be a load of hot air as she brought in Orla and Nicky with her. They were clearly isolated from the task and were left pounding the pavements of Naas with megaphones, stilettos, and high visibility jackets. A bitchy Joanna defined her reason for this as ‘I couldn’t stand to spend even a second more with them’
Mark’s comment comes back to me about Joanna ‘burning her bridges’ with everyone in the house, and this is proof if ever there was proof.
This review has turned into the ‘Joanna show’ which would only delight the dethroned cheating “wagon face”.
Moving swiftly along then, elsewhere I thought team Phoenix were outstanding this week in all areas. They showed great initiative by getting their recycle day publicised on the radio and even by the priest at mass! The whole of team Phoenix would deserve to be in the final just based on that performance. Sarah was the stand out for me after her lacklustre performance as project manager last week. Both she and Shane were outstanding. She is also the only candidate not to be brought back into the boardroom yet. I’m going to back her to win now!
And after losing potential winners the last two weeks in the form of Mark and Joanna, it has blown the whole competition wide open for anyone to win now. So next week will be really make or break for the candidates and hopefully someone will take the lead as the new front runner.
P.S. by A.J.
I was going to do a Photoshop with Joanna as Jack Nicholson in the Shining, but I just didn’t have time. Instead here’s the screen cap I would have used. I should have used Joanna’s face for the Hallowe’en mask thingy I did.
Irish Apprentice Watch – Week 6 – The one with Marcel Marceau
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Review by Ian Walsh.
We are now halfway through this ‘gruelling’ 12 week job interview. This week proved how reality shows can be really unpredictable and it threw up possibly the biggest shock so far, which really disappointed me.
The task was clearly something close to Bill’s heart, and no we are not back on Moore Street again but in the showroom of a Renault garage. The objective was but a simple one, to sell cars. But the cracks clearly began to show from the off. Mark was clearly bored off his head and it wasn’t half obvious when he showed where his bored head was :
‘‘I’d rather be selling bananas on Moore Street’’
This was a complete shock to my system, and I was concerned when I saw this attitude and thought nothing of it at first. I figured he would surely change his tune and step up to the plate, but it wasn’t to be.
Nicky was project manager for Dynamo, and had the difficult task of keeping Joanna on a tight leash. A bit of an impossible task to keep her in check it must be said. This meant Nicky left herself open to being manipulated and undermined. It wasn’t entirely Nicky’s fault but she was indecisive and couldn’t make a clear cut decision, the total opposite of Joanna.
It seems we have made the transition from the ‘long grass’ to the ‘bushes’ , where Joanna has been waiting for Nicky to be project manager. Joanna seems to be at home with nature, I wonder where will she be next. Among the flowerbeds? Who knows..
As I said last week we would all like the chance to see Sarah as project manager and this week was her chance to shine. I haven’t any real criticisms about her but at the same time I wouldn’t be going off raving about her, not yet anyway. Stuart was essentially the star man and rightly so because this was his forte. He went from zero to hero and put himself right back in contention for the ‘dream job’.
Obviously Brenda makes enough money in her bridal shop that she drives a car that doesn’t use a conventional key, as she came out with this quote while trying to start one of the Renault models:
‘‘its been so long since I used a key’’
Luckily nobody asked to be taken on a test drive, or better still she wasn’t asked to park the cars in showroom. One may suspect that it may have taken longer than Stuart’s ridiculous two hour tour de force.
Now to the boardroom where Nicky had no choice but to drag Mark and Joanna in with her. As usual Joanna played the innocent little girl act having no clue why she was there. She is someone who I could never work with. She appears to be confrontational, undermining and manipulative – traits that I can’t tolerate. Mark on the other hand was ready to go. He threw the towel in the moment the task started. This is the same guy that was Bill’s special one ever since we lay eyes on him five weeks ago. Subsequently it was an easy decision for Bill and Mark was fired.
I am on the fence regarding the decision, he did give up on that task there is no doubt about that but based on past form was it the right thing to let him go? I liked Mark and I am sad to see him depart. I am sure a lot of people will be too, including Bill. I think from this point onwards its going to get very interesting.
Just a quick note, spotted in the Daily Mail. Monday nights episode peaked at 405,000 views, I’d like to say well done to the show and to TV3!
Apprentice bits ahead of Week 6
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Darren is taking the reigns of the live blog this week, the fun and games kick off just before 9 and if you’ve never joined a live blog, you should because it’s better than shouting at the tv screen.
Jennifer Maguire denies rumours of her and Ryan Tubridy being an item. She reckons it will be one of the women that will emerge as the eventual winner and I think she’s right too. She also says Bill is nicer than Sir Alan.
PS – Jennifer – if you’re reading this – thanks for replying to that email I sent you.
Meanwhile, the ab fab Orla McAdam is apparantly being swept off her Dundalk feet by some guy called Dave. Sounds promising and sure to last a long time.
UnaRocks wasn’t happy that Orla went last week and though Stuart should have gone. She has also heard from a little bird that next week is the episode to watch “because a lot of shit goes down.” Maybe Una should host the live blog next week.
That’s about it for this week. Car selling is the task for this week – should be good. See you at Darren’s at 9.
Irish Apprentice Watch – Week 5 – The one with wagon face
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Review by Ian Walsh.
Well it seems to me that the honeymoon period is over, the gloves are off so let the bitching begin. And who is the bitching aimed towards? Joanna. She is feisty, she is a “warrior” and even describes herself as a control freak. Shane added she’s a ‘wagon face’ for good measure. Wagon face or not, she is the one who is a threat to everyone.
This week’s task was a deceptively simple one. Make a 45 second TV commercial for the Elysian high spec Cork city apartment. Yes , the ELYSIAN, and not ESSIENCE as project manager Stuart failed to say the name correctly in his pitch to the O’Flynn Group. It certainly shows why he is the ‘only candidate to win a task yet’, now that’s a bad omen if ever I saw one.
Mark really summed up team Dynamo’s ad as ‘a cheap porn movie’ which featured a couple having a pillow fight in bed together, but it was something that paid off for them and won them the task.
In the boardoom Bill immediately dismissed Shane saying there was no valid reason for him to be there, and there wasn’t. Stuart was told by Bill he’s staying because he’s a fighter, therefore Orla had to take the walk of shame and it was a justified result because I felt she should have gone last week.
We are now getting to see what the candidates are really made of.
Next week I want to see Sarah and Shane more, so hopefully they will be the project leaders and get their chance to shine. Joanna is likely to be in the final, as she is such a strong candidate in my opinion.
And here for your pleasure, is the winning ad featuring Paddy O’Dea as the voiceover man.
Week 4 Catchup Review
Maybe it is because I was sick while reviewing this weeks show but everything seemed to annoy me about the episode.
First off I didn’t get the whole concept of the task at hand and to be fair neither did both of the teams. Joanna who made a total ‘balls’ of her speech, justified herself by saying that she didn’t ‘hide in the long grass’ but someone who did emerge from Joanna’s so called ‘long grass’ this week was Brenda who proved to be an immediate success as the team leader of Dynamo and was the main reason they won the task.
Now the two teams are at two apiece, for me it should have been Phoenix team leader Orla who should have been fired as she was a total under-performer in the task. But a week can make a big difference as Avril who was hailed a feisty ‘warrior’ last week, became the first female to be fired.
The boardroom scene of Orla, Joanna & Avril shouting their heads off at each other really ruined the show but, being three women what would you expect. Bitching! It was a total turn off and cringe worthy moment for me and I hope not to see it again too soon.
Apprentice bits ahead of Week 5
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* This weeks live blog of the show is being hosted by Anthony McGuinness. Be sure to tune in to the show and to the live blog as the combination makes for great entertainment.
* Brian Purcell (I call him Lurch), had a bit of snigger about Ronan Whitty joining Ryanair. When ‘de herdald’ asked him what he thought about Michael O’Leary hiring Cullen’s reject, he laughed and said:
“We hadn’t thought of it like that. It’s funny. We only found out in the last few days the he had that job.”
Ryanair got a dig back sauing “Ronan’s had enough messing about on TV, how he’ll be getting real-world experience with Ryanair, Europe’s most financially secure airline”.
Most financially secure, but for how long is what I wonder..
* Bill is blaming John Gormley for the drop in car sales. Don’t see it myself.
* Last week’s evictee, Avril Daly, gets commiserated on her bebo page.
“you were shafted girl i would to slap them other two bitches in the face that Bill Cullen is a joke you are better off out of it keep the chin up everyone knows you were shafted . PS you are hot as well.”
+ someone points out on Ray Foley’s blog that Avril seems to be wearing a footlocker uniform. She was also given 12 out 15 – obviously a Foley show thing. Out of 10 isn’t enough like. There must be a story behind that.
* Declan Cashin has a great separated at birth post. I still think Mark is the image of Bill.
* Beaut.ie is the most uber focused blog in Ireland. Their take on last weeks episode.
* For your enjoyment, I put together the many faces of Joanna during her toe curling presentations last week. She is quite scary. If she wins this thing I will leave the country.
Mr. Potato Head. DO YOU. DO YOU. DO YOU. Masterclass in presentation by Mark O’Rourke.
TV3 Tonight, 9pm. They are off to Cork to make a porn flick or something. Be there or be a saddo watching Who do you think you are..
